Tuesday, January 19, 2010

A Few Things I've Noticed Over the Last 30 Years

Atheists don't get mad if you tell them there IS a god.

I have never seen news footage of PETA protesting leather clothing while standing outside of a biker bar.

I've never heard a gay person say "gross!" when they see a hetero couple kiss.

People who throw fits over the phrase "Happy Holidays" don't throw fits when wrestlers use Bible passages to market themselves. See: Stone Cold Steve Austin.

I checked, and there is no rule in the English language that states putting a "c" or a "k" after an "s" magically switches the letters around. "Escape." "Ask." "Retard."

If you see someone smoking, it is acceptable to tell them they are killing themselves. If you see someone cramming greasy burgers down their throat, it is not. (These are things I've NOTICED, not things I UNDERSTAND.)

If pictures on Facebook are a reflection of reality, 95% of women under the age of 30 are always making a sexy-kissy face.

People who spit while they are outdoors do not spit while they are indoors.